Not everything about aging is hunky dory. My lower back hurts if I’m on my feet for more than an hour, I get destructively dizzy if I stand up too fast and I’ve entered my gray nose hair years, etc.
HOWEVER, my fellow millennials and I are also old enough to have disposable income, and our childhoods are being repackaged to give us that sweet hit of dopamine. Ergo, the local concert calendar is catering hard to the ’90s kid inside the best of us right now.
Were you hoping for some smooth R&B, ferocious hip-hop and bopping New Jack Swing?
🎟️ April 4: Give ‘em something 4 da honeyz as 6-foot-8-inches-tall “Masked Singer” alumnus Montell Jordan and the Oklahoma-bred Color Me Badd sex you up at the Clearwater Casino.
🎟️ April 11: O.G. original gangster Ice-T takes a break from overexplaining obvious criminal behavior on “Law & Order: Special Victims Unit” to get the Tulalip Resort Casino to sing along to “Cop Killer.”
🎟️ April 17: South Central hip-hop unit The Pharcyde brings their irreverent humor to Tacoma’s Airport Tavern, making sure everybody freaks the funk.
🎟️ April 18: 13-time Grammy winner Kenneth Brian Edmonds, a.k.a. Babyface, is responsible for some of the greatest hits of your youth. Get to Muckleshoot Casino and hear a mix of solo work and the bangers he wrote and produced for the likes of Boyz II Men, Toni Braxton and Whitney Houston.
Maybe you were more of a torn jeans-sporting, mascara-wearing, pit-moshing suburbanite who always felt sad and misunderstood. I got you.
🎟️ April 15: Subgenre-hopping NorCal rock band AFI, with front man Davey Havoc’s immediately identifiable lead vocals still firmly in place, are going to pack the Showbox SoDo. Expect lots of straight-edge adults nursing cans of sparkling water.
🎟️ April 18: Ska punk never went away; you just weren’t paying attention. Goldfinger’s gonna get you skanking at the Showbox and trigger warm memories of Tony Hawk’s Pro Skater, pizza arcades and extra mozzarella sticks.
🎟️ April 18: “One Headlight” is now 30 years old, and Jakob “Don’t Call Me Bob’s Son” Dylan and his band The Wallflowers will be playing their biggest single and the rest of the Bringing Down the Horse album at Edmonds Center for the Arts.
🎟️ April 29: I live in a pro-Gwen Stefani household and even mentioning her ex-husband Gavin Rossdale makes my wife say, “good riddance to that nannyf*cker.” Unfortunately for her, “Sixteen Stone” was one of my favorite albums in middle school, I love the movie Fear and I will absolutely be shouting the lyrics to “Comedown” as Bush takes the stage at the WaMu Theater.
